Current mood:

indescribable

It was all going so well.
Last night, I couldn't sleep. So, I just finished an 11 hour shift serving, and I am utterly exhausted. However, I managed to drive to Blaine, work, and drive back without any problems. I even got gas, and made a friend at work.

I was totally up for a night of relaxation. I come home to Dan sitting in the bathtub in the dark, filling it. He will barely talk to me. He just says he's had a bad day- he's sitting with a bottle of bacardi and a can of fresca. I didn't think anything of it, maybe he needed time to relax. It did worry me moderately.. I didn't mean to snoop. I just looked at his monitor, the first webpage that was sitting there, was a list of suicide attempts. Wonderful.

I don't know what to do. My stomach is twisting in knots- I told him I would leave him alone. What the hell is he planning on doing in there? I can only assume drink himself to death with bacardi 151, but I don't know.. is he really going to do it? or is he just trying to sort it all out?

I don't know.

Edit (6:41 AM)
Just woke up.. Dan's alive and appears uninjured, and I guess that's all I could ask for. I am still angry- he hasn't said anything at all to me about what happened to make him the way he was. I guess he talked to Joe, so at least he vented to someone, but I'm the one sitting here dealing with this shit and he won't even throw me a fucking bone. Blah.. on the upside, i slept, and by the time I finish serving today I'll probably be too tired to care again.